Nurture the Basics to Fulfill Your Highest Self
By Sheri McGregor, Life Coach for Women

Most people are familiar with psychologist Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, represented by a layered triangle. When I look at his hierarchy, I see a balanced life. Maslow asserted that our basic physical needs must be met in order to satisfy higher level needs including safety, belonging, esteem, and at the highest level - self-actualization.

Self-actualization involves fulfillment, and rising to one's highest potential. For some, this means pursuing endeavors such as writing a book to share their highest truth or fulfill a calling. Others derive self-actualization through art, dance, or creating a thriving business. Still others seek volunteer service, to teach, or work abroad where they can fulfill a desire to help the needy or do missionary work. Even mothering well is self-actualization for some. When our actions are integrated with who we are, we can reach periods of self-actualization in almost any fulfilling activity. During our life journey, our interests may evolve and change, allowing us to reach different points and facets of self-actualizing.

As we move toward self-actualization or are simply on overwhelm juggling many commitments, Maslow's lower-level needs often take lesser precedence. In our busy, sometimes chaotic lives, the basics of making sure we eat well and satisfy our needs for belonging can get buried under the mantra of not enough time. Yet, the lower levels are actual needs. Forget the basics long enough and we find ourselves running on the empty. We may eat fast food devoid of healthy nutrients or neglect social time that could fulfill our belonging needs. Our esteem needs involve self-respect. If we neglect our health, trash our physical bodies and neglect relationships, our self-esteem also suffers. Taking care of all our needs represents living a balanced life.

When it comes to financial wellness, the phrase, "Pay yourself first," is often used. When fulfilling our highest potential, we may want to adopt a similar attitude of taking care of our basic needs first. Without the basics, self-actualization may end up being a lonely, ill place. Lay the groundwork and continue to nurture the basics of health, safety, belonging and esteem. Ultimately then, the top of the hierarchy is a place of balance, and cause for celebration.

HOW TO:
Physiological Needs: Plan ahead. Pack a healthy lunch when you'll be away. If eating out, look at the menu online if possible, and choose healthfully before you go. Also plan at-home meals, and make them simple. I love to use the crock pot. It's a relief at the end of a long day to be greeted by a delicious aroma. When energy levels are at their lowest, dinner is done! Other basics include allowing yourself actual breaks, keeping a sweater or jacket handy, carrying bottled water, a toothbrush, and whatever else cares for your basic needs. Take good care of yourself. You deserve it.

Safety: Plan ahead. Carry hand sanitizer. Regularly maintain your car to avoid mishaps that put you in danger. Consider carrying pepper spray or mace (and learn how to use it). Know where you're going, and get directions online ahead of time. Take care of your financial health, and live within your means. Doing so means emergency money exists, and your home is more stable. As a parent, safety needs may also include good daycare and other items that look out for the safety needs of your children.

Belonging: Look at the month ahead and plan in some social engagements that replenish your need to belong. This may mean membership and meeting attendance in a group or organization you enjoy, or simply scheduling in lunch with a friend every couple of weeks. It's easy to take family time for granted. Plan some dates with individual family members, or block out special whole family time. Consider using your child's school schedule to block out all their full and half days off so you won't be torn between them and your work. It may be helpful to consult with your significant other as well. People in happy long-term relationships know that focused together time doesn't just happen.

Esteem: Concentrate on your success. It's easy to focus on what we didn't get done rather than what we did well. If you're working toward a specific goal and have a plan, focus on the times you succeed rather than the times you don't. For instance, if you're shooting for 4 exercise sessions a week but miss two days out of the month, you've succeeded far more days than you failed. Focus on those, forgive yourself, and continue forward. For some people, marking a star on the calendar helps them see their progress. This sounds elementary school, but we all have a child within!

Self-Actualization: In Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, the triangle's lower levels form a sturdy foundation. Nurturing the basics supports the structure on which you climb to your highest fulfillment.

Copyright 2009 By Sheri McGregor --all rights reserved